text || William J. Fedigan

Thing is…


Thing is, Lady Friend cranked again. Twacked, tweeked, bato again. But legal this time. She go to doc, she say: I think I got ADH-Tee. Doc say: Ok. Pay cash. 3 refill. Next thing, she flyin toothless and ruthless. Legal.
       She say crank take away pain. Pain in life, pain in heart. She say crank take away pain in ass: That be Jimmy. She want Jimmy dead.
       -I want you dead, Jimmy, she say, dead dead dead dead, she say real fast like she stutter. DEAD! YOU HEAR ME? she say.
       Jimmy hear. Everybody hear. Dog howl for chissakes.
       -DEAD!
       Thing is, Jimmy want to be dead. Jimmy dope-sick. Blood itches, body twitches. Sweat like Hebrew slave building pyramid breathin sand. Jimmy want to be dead.
       -DEAD! Lady Friend wild crazy. Eyes bout to burst.
       Next thing, dish knife fork spoon, utensils all kind flyin at Jimmy in a hurry. Jimmy run, hide in closet with coats. He think he see lost jacket. Shit, he say, bin looking everyplace for…
       -I piss away five years of my life for you. An for what? FOR WHAT, JIMMY? FIVE YEARS FIVE YEARS FIVE YEARS, she stutter again. FOR WHAT? HEAR ME, JIMMY?
             Next thing, Son bitch one door down say: SHUT FUCK UP!
Jimmy stay in closet with shoes, umbrella, lost jacket. Jimmy stay in closet and wait. Jimmy wait for cops.
              Cops come. Jimmy outta closet. Lady Friend cool. Cops say something bout complaint, domestic disturbance, some shit. We Ok, no problem, Jimmy say. Won’t happen again, officer, Jimmy say. Some shit like that.
             Cops look round. See dish knife fork spoon, utensils all kind everyplace. Cops look close at Jimmy. Thing is, Jimmy still dope-sick. Blood itch, body twitch, sweat like Hebrew slave. Jimmy want to be dead right now.
           -You sure everything Ok? Cop say. He look close at Jimmy.
           -Everything Ok, Jimmy say. We fine, Lady friend say.
           Cops look round one time more, leave.

       Lady Friend sit in kitchen. She look tired. She look at Jimmy. Next thing, she put face in hands. She cry. Tears fall down.
       Jimmy look at Lady Friend sit in kitchen, sit in kitchen and cry.
       Jimmy look at her. She all wore out. She look like balloon with no air inside her, Jimmy think. Jimmy feel bout the same.
               Jimmy sit next to Lady Friend. Jimmy doesn’t know. Jimmy doesn’t know should he touch her.

              Thing is, Jimmy doesn’t know.